Y-PET Framework . . . The Art & Science of Lasting Behavior Change

Be Your Own Best Coach is a group-coaching program that offers you everything you need to get where you want in your career and at home. It also is the antidote to the failure of singular focus and one-and-done thinking

We built Be Your Own Best Coach from the ground up using insights from our 80 years of combined experience in human performance and by synthesizing and distilling the top theories and practices from neuroscience; psychology; cognitive, social, and health sciences; human performance and deliberate practice; behavioral economics and behavior design.

One of the biggest stumbling blocks to successful change, whether it’s making a one-time change or breaking persistent bad habits, is that people fail to recognize that many different factors influence their thoughts, feelings, and behavior.

Imagine trying to improve your work-life balance by putting into place new productivity strategies; time-boxing your work and sticking to a schedule in which you shut down for the day no later than 6:00 pm; and committing to eating healthy, getting daily exercise, and sleeping 8 hours of sleep a night.

Sounds great, right?

No imagine trying to do that when you live and work with people who are in flat-out, work-round-the-clock mode to get ahead in their careers; survive on Coca-Cola, candybars, and takeout; and think that running to catch a taxi is adequate exercise because after all, they’re still young(ish).

No matter how hard you try, how motivated you are, or how important it is for you to stick to your behavior ideals, all we can say is “good luck.”

Considering the context in which you live and work, it will be super hard, if not impossible, to make your behaviors stick for good.

That’s why Be Your Own Best Coach features our Y-PET framework. Y-PET gives you a systematic way to account for all the varied factors that can either put you into the winner’s circle of positive change or leave you at the back of the pack.

But a framework isn’t enough. It organizes your efforts but doesn’t define the right actions to take. That’s where the integration of solution-focused practice and behavior design come into the mix.

We’ll share our work in both solution-focused practice and behavior design in future blogs. For now, let’s take a look at Y-PET.

Y-PET Gives You a Powerful Framework for Change

Y-PET stands for You, People, Environment, and Things. (By the way, we pronounce it “Why-pet.”)

YOU is all the internal factors that make you who you are and drive you to act the way you do. You is also the skills and strengths you already have that give you the ability to express--through your actions-- who you are and what you stand for.
PEOPLE are your social connections--from your family, friends, coworkers, and acquaintances to the guides, mentors, teachers, and colleagues you learn from and who help you along your journey.
ENVIRONMENT is the space you live, work, play, and pray in. It includes critical but often overlooked factors like light, sound, color, smell, texture, space. And, perhaps most importantly for today’s world, environment includes your digital space.
THINGS are the externals that help you to get to where you want. Things include incentives and disincentives, tools, props, and cues.

These are the four crucial factors you must account for in a systematic and deliberate way if you want to make the changes in your life you need to live the kind of life you want.

The You in Y-PET: From Dreams and Desires to Meaning and Purpose

Let’s start by taking a deeper dive into the first element of Y-PET, the YOU.

There are lots of moving parts in YOU, but a key part of YOU is to know who you are. We’re not talking about your education, training, work function, family role, or what you like to do in your free time.

We’re talking about the hero inside of you. That hero that is capable and effective--the hero that manages to keep you going, no matter what.

You know that saying, “When the going gets tough, the tough get going?”

Its origins are a little fuzzy, but most likely it came from American football to mean that when conditions get really challenging, the people who keep at it, take action, and succeed are those with strong characters who aren’t afraid to meet head-on whatever difficulties they encounter.

That strength of character is also what’s associated with effective self-leadership: what you do to manage, motivate, and keep yourself going so you perform at the level you want.

Self-leadership is more than just performance alone, however. It’s what enables people to create meaningful, purposeful lives for themselves.

And it starts with the self-knowledge that’s part of the YOU part of our Y-PET framework.

Without knowing yourself deeply--and managing yourself--you could easily get stuck in some of the common problems that plague a lot of people today. Problems like blaming and shaming yourself for even the tiniest faults, feeling like a fake and suffering with imposter syndrome, or being beaten down by the voice of a harsh inner critic.

But the YOU in Y-PET is about not just avoiding problems so you survive. It’s about discovering and amplifying your true, heroic self. It’s the hero within who aims for the moon, chooses hard things, ignores outside noise, and isn’t afraid to fail.*

The People in Y-PET: Distinguishing Between Friends and Foes, Transforming the Later into the Former

The second element in our Y-PET framework is People.

For just a moment, think about the power of others to influence us. Here are just a few of the many ways the people around us shape how we think, feel, and act:

Peer pressure: What parent from time immemorial hasn’t worried--at one time or another--that peer pressure might lead their teen down the wrong road?

In the 50s and 60s the hit song, Ya Got Trouble, from the 1957 Broadway musical, The Music Man, told the story of a corrupt, traveling musical instrument salesman who played on parents’ fears that their boys would be corrupted by the new pool hall in town and tried to convince them to fund a boys’ marching band instead.

Today, parents worry about their teens being lured into substance use, unsafe sex, bullying, risky behaviors, and feeling pressured to hang out instead of focusing on school.
Bystander effect: The famous case of Kitty Genovese who was murdered in 1964 led researchers to develop the theory that in the presence of others, we are much more likely to hold back and not volunteer our help to someone in need. Although the original account about the Genovese murder--38 bystanders did nothing--was proven to be grossly exaggerated, the theory has been replicated many times over the years. The theory still stands as valid. Instead of automatically jumping to aid someone else, we pause to assess what’s going on, weigh how much responsibility we feel, consider how and how much we can help, and then take action.
FOMO—Fear of Missing Out—has gained a lot of attraction (and this name) since social media has become so widely used. For some people who are on social media, particularly those who are more vulnerable, the fear of missing out on other people’s jokes, messages, posts, or invitations; or being excluded from a discussion or activity can contribute to anxiety and depression.
Accountability: Multiple research studies suggest that simply by announcing your intentions and goals to another person can boost the likelihood of success many times over. Moreover, having another person or group to report progress to can increase that likelihood even more.
Social contagion: The power of others to influence you cuts both ways. If you are around people who smoke, eat junk food, are overweight or obese, you’re more likely to become a smoker, junk food eater, and overweight or obese. At the same time, if you surround yourself with folks who adhere to healthy lifestyle practices, you probably will too. That’s the power of social norms. Attitudes and behavior are as contagious as viruses, and just as powerful to keep us alive or kill us.

Although we’re talking here about the modern influence of others on our lives, the fact is that we’re hard-wired for social connection from the beginning of time through our evolution.

Humans are social animals.

It’s our job to make sure that we manage our relationships so they do us the most good and reduce the risk of harm.

That’s why our Y-PET framework not only spells out the social factors and their influence on you, but gives you a systematic way to manage those factors and make them work for you.

The Environment in Y-PET: It’s Where You’re at, Not Who You Are

Environment is the third element in our Y-PET framework.

We’re not talking about the environment in terms of saving endangered species and cutting emissions, although both are important.

When we talk about the environment, we mean your physical surroundings in their totality.

Why is environment so important?

It’s summed up by the simple statement of social psychologists: “It’s the situation, not the person.”

While we may think that careful analysis, deliberation, well-considered decision-making and free will are all that determine how well we do in our lives, this is a critical principle to embrace because it suggests that there’s a lot more that goes on behind the scenes.

“Situation” is both the social context we find ourselves in--the People in Y-PET--and the physical world around us--the Environment in Y-PET.

“Situation” in terms of environment is easy to understand: Just reflect on what we call “resort-retreat syndrome.”

Can you imagine what we mean by this?

You want to lose weight, get in shape, reduce your stress, handle your finances better, find love, etc, so you go on a retreat that promises to completely transform your life . . . and it does!

For the duration of the retreat, that is.

The setting is gorgeous. Your life is scheduled to the minute. Your attention is directed only to the kind of thinking that promotes your desired outcome. Nothing distracts you. Nothing competes for the energy you have to reach your goals. The activities you engage in lay the foundation for positive change. Everyone else at the retreat is there for the same reason and moving in the same direction as you. Professional staff knows exactly what buttons to push and where to pull to help you feel like the world’s your oyster and anything is possible.

And it is . . . for the duration of the retreat.

The problem is that when you get home--back into your own environment--the whole thing comes crashing down. If not immediately, then soon afterwards.

The resort-retreat syndrome is the set of challenges, problems, and failures you experience when you exit the ideal environment of the resort retreat. You’re left to your own devices with so many factors arguing against you.

So how do we approach Environment?

Two ways in which most, if not all of us, approach questions about how we live our lives is asking:

What do I like?
How does it make me feel?

Of course, liking and feeling good about your environment are important, but that leaves too much that really counts to chance.That’s because preferences may change.

And feelings are fleeting. Just think about how many feelings you cycle through just in an hour.

Take the first hour of the morning. You could be happy when you wake up, concerned while you’re brushing your teeth and remember a deadline you have at work, pleasure as you step into the shower, loving when you notice that your partner bought your favorite shampoo, demoralized when you step on the scale and see that your extra “pandemic pounds” are jiggling around your middle, excited when you open your closet and see the clothes you’re going to wear to your best friend’s party.

We probably don’t have to go on to prove the point that feelings are anything but set.

To maximize the power of your environment to help you get the things done that you need to, maintain the habits that help you do the right things right, and generally, succeed, you need to ask a different, more strategic question:

How do I manage my physical surroundings so that it’s easy for me to do what I want to do?

And a YOU question:

How do my physical surroundings reflect who I am and what I value?

Plus, a PEOPLE question:

Does my environment reflect how I want to be seen by the world?

By the way, what’s important to note is that one challenge related to environment is that it includes both the situation you have control over as well as that in which you have little or not control.

When you have control there’s plenty to do. But even when you have no control, that doesn’t mean there is nothing to do.

Our Y-PET framework helps you make sense of both situations and to work creatively and powerful with each.

The Things in Y-PET: How to Harness the Power of Putting the Right Things to Work for You

Things is the fourth and last element in our Y-PET framework.

Malcolm Forbes, among the 400 richest men in America in the 20th century, is quoted as having said, “He who dies with the most toys, wins.”

We like to rework this quote to “The person with things that work and fit for them succeeds.” That is, the person whose things help them get on track and stay the course for crafting the life they want is a winner.

As we’ve said, things include incentives and disincentives, tools, props, and cues.

What makes things so important?

Probably the most often quoted story about the power of “things” to influence behavior is Pavlov’s experiments with dogs.

Ivan Pavlov, Russian scientist and the first Russian to receive a Nobel Prize, predicted that dogs would salivate in response to food being placed in front of them. But, what surprised him and opened the door to his great discoveries about learned behavior is that his dogs would begin to salivate whenever they heard the footsteps of his assistant who brought food to the dogs.

This observation led to Pavlov’s famous study in which he exposed his dogs to the ticking sound of a metronome before presenting them with their food. Although the metronome was a neutral stimulus unrelated to food, the dogs still salivated because of the association that had been established in their brains between the ticking metronome and food.

The discovery that anything, an object or event--even the footsteps of his lab assistant--which the dogs learned to associate with food, could trigger the same response (ie, salivation) over and over, was huge and important. As a result, Pavlov devoted the rest of his career to studying this phenomenon which we now call classic conditioning.

Although people do not respond exactly like Pavlov's dogs, his insights into how we learn and the mechanism by which a neutral thing, such as the ticking of a metronome, can trigger specific, repeated behavior does apply to us.

Using things to foster desired behavior and avoid undesired behavior or trigger automatic habits, like Pavlov’s dogs, works in many different ways.Take just a brief moment to think of the ways you use incentives and disincentives, tools, props, and cues to help you take action.

Your list might include an alarm clock to help you get up in the morning, pop-up reminders, to-do lists, pill boxes, key hook near the front door, composting canister near the prep area in the kitchen, basket containing hand weights near your desk, timers, maps, subscriptions to a health newsletter, or direct deposit of your paycheck. The list is endless.

One thing to note is that we can use things to make it easier for us to take deliberate, conscious action, like having an electric toothbrush that’s already plugged in and sitting right by the bathroom sink.

Things also can be used to make certain behaviors automatic and effortless, like saving money by using a banking system that automatically deducts and deposits money from our paycheck to a designated savings account.

Our Y-PET framework helps you identify, choose, and activate a plan for using things that boosts the likelihood of your success in the change game.

Y-PET Offers a Comprehensive Framework for Lasting Change

Before we finish for right now, there’s one thing that’s crucial to note--and it’s the reason Y-PET works: There’s no one single thing that determines your success and happiness. It’s not only what’s inside of you. It’s not only the people around you. And it’s not only your environment.

Social psychologists may say, “It’s the situation, not the person” to alert us to appreciate the external factors that shape us, but nothing is all one way or another. It’s not only the person. It’s not only people. And it’s not only the situation. And it’s not only things.

We start by examining each of the four factors of Y-PET individually. But remember, there’s the element of “between.”

That is, between each factor is their interrelationship and their interaction. How is the YOU influenced and affected by People, Environment, and Things? And how do the interactions change what and how you do?

That’s where the rubber meets the road.

It’s also where the magic happens.

If you're just joining and missed the series of posts featuring the Be Your Own Best Coach revolutionary Y-PET framework on the Art & Science of Lasting Change, catch up on previous posts below.

Y-PET stands for You, People, Environment, and Things. It’s a framework for change that gives you a systematic and deliberate way to manage the many factors that can either put you into the winner’s circle of positive change or leave you at the back of the pack.